Oh my, it’s been a while.
<<my sincerest apologies!!! truly.>>
I feel like I do just as well adding new blog posts (on the regular) as I do maintaining my friendships! Actually, that’s not true. I have invested extra effort into mindfully improving my maintaining-of-friendships over the past few years. I’m proud to say that.
I’m proud to write that because. let’s just say that I spent my highschool years attending four different schools in three countries. (Some of you could make a drinking game from how many times you’ve heard me say that.) Add a geographically fragmented teen-hood to my quiet, shy, depressive, anxious (emotionally neglected) teenage self. It was rough mostly. Seemingly unbearable at times. Teen O would have benefited from finding a goth crew to pale and brood with. (Crew, right? Crew? Or are a group of goths called a…uuuuuh, goat? A goat of goths? A gaggle of goths?)
Having to re-adjust and build new friendships every year takes an exponentially increasing toll on a person. And so, I didn’t have much practice “friendshipping” while growing up. It’s something I continue to actively work at because I know it’s worth the (temporary) uncomfortable painful feelings that sometimes shake out when someone treats you kind, someone treats you like a friend.
I wasn’t able to join a circle of friends who experience all those teenage things together. They build memories, share stories. They’ve witnessed each other’s smiles grow into their faces and remember what other other’s favorite colors were as littles. Their parent(s) are friends with yours; they have memories and stories, too. There are pictures, tons of pictures. (Sidenote: On my ‘don’t-need-so-immediately-but- wouldn’t-mind-acquiring-one-now’ wish list is a Super 8 camera. A belated birthday gift is still within reason. After March 5th, you can give it to me on Friendship Day, which is every day of the year. 🙂
<<<SKRIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEECH!>>> (record scratch)
Sorry. I’m cutting this short! I have an opportunity to jam with some really cool people ahora (translation: right now) so I am going to away. What I wanted to say in this post – nutshell version:
- Kevin has continued to welcome me in to his life, introduced me to his friends – his amazing wonderful friends.
- Kevin has given me a chosen family. or helped me to allow family in.
- Maintaining friendship is important. friendship borne of reciprocal support, love, and respect.
- Music is therapy.
- My depression has been lifting. I know a key reason is the lifestyle I’ve created together with Kevin and Fuzz. I know it’s partially because of the authentic, meaningful friendships that have been sprouting like happy bright spring flowers in bloom.
- I love our life.
- I’m still significantly sensitive. as I’ve always been and will be. and it’s OK.
I end this entry with something Kevin said to me this evening. I was telling him what this blog post was about. He said,
“We don’t need friends, we just need each other!”
What do you think was my response?
I leave you in wonder and wish you joyful well.
And thank you for coming back to my snaily blog or for reading this!
**Edited from original post 3/3/17.